Of Wind and Fire
by Matier
Summary: Matier was not a normal person. In fact, he's not a person at all. He's an anthro fox chased by society. This is his story
1. Chapter 1 Depression

Of Wind and Fire

-Chapter 1-Depression-A storm was approaching as Matier walked out in the rain with his tail swishing behind his butt. His tail was unnaturally long as it took up half of his body. However he usually let it curl around his waist as he walked so he wouldn't trip on it. It was longer than his legs for crying out loud and it reached the heels of his feet. He didn't know most foxes who had a long tail like his. Most would say he was gifted as his tail was very strong, could balance himself with it, lift small objests with it if he was lazy, hang from trees or even use it as a pillow. He thought of it as a nuisance having to keep it groomed all the time. Then again, he didn't know any other he dealed with it. But he did like the fact that it was more useful than just a nuisance.

Thunder flashed as rain started to pour and his tight shorts were starting to get soaked along with his favorite shirt with his favorite band H.I.M. He was an odd fox with unsual characteristics and fashions for being just a normal fox. He had medium blue hair, the same color of his fur that reached his mid back and bangs that hung in his eyes. He had a pendant carved out of an emerald that was the same color of his emerald eyes. On his upper arms he had tribal markings that always seemed to glow whenever he was depressed or upset. This kind of bothered him as he always took the markings as a curse. He also liked to "accessorize" quite a bit. First of all he had a headdress with with a ruby in the center. Added to that he had golden cuffs on his arms that started a little bit below his wrists and went to just below his elbows and the same ones that started the same distance below his ankles and went a little bit below his also had a thing for wearing two large silver rings on his tail. To top it all off going along with his pendant, he liked to wear a gold with copper in it choker. He was a truly odd fox who really didn't have a care in the world in the world. He just liked to be himself no matter what people said about him.

He found a tree to sit under and to get away from the pouring rain as it seemed to come down harder by each second. "Fuck this rain...", he said as it came down harder at his tone to show it's hatred for the odd creature. "Damn it!" "I hate you too, okay?", he screamed at nothing but the sky. He wanted to go back to the city, but he had a hard time getting away from the local authorities who had called him "a freak who had the proportion of a human, who walked like a human, spoke like a human, but on the outside he was a blue fox, who had been caught stealing some meat and ran off with it just like a human would..." "That was what that called me?", he asked himself. "I don't care..." "So what if I'm not human? "They're all scum anyways..." "There's nothing good about them..." "They should all just die..." "I'm hate it when people tease me for all this shit..." "Well they'll have their wish one day..." "Soon I'll cease to exist..."

He took a box cutter from his pocket, and flipped it open. He then took off one of the cuffs on his arms to reveal now healing cuts that would be let open again. He ran the blade across just above his wrist and up his arm as he winced a bit and let a single tear fall down his face. He ran it up again over a different area as blood dripped onto the wet grass mixing with the rain. Any amateur would have killed himself at this point, but Matier knew were to cut from watching so many times from people who cut themselves on a daily basis not hitting any important veins. He gave one last cut to himself as the blood flow was really going and he was on the verge of passing out. He got his cuff and slid his arm back into it slowing the bleeding down as it constricted his arm and applied pressure to the cuts. He panted heavily as he lay down in the rain and cried some more. "

Why am I judged for what I look like? "Why can't people just accept me for who I am? His blade for his boxcutter was starting to get dull as he threw it away and replaced it with a fresh one, having used up both sides. He folded it back up and put it away in his pocket. He sighed as the rain continued to pour and he watched his blood puddle soak into the soil as the rain did it's work. He always wondered what would happen if his blood mixed with the roots of the trees around him. "They would probably all hate themselves...", he said as he chuckled a bit. "Still seventeen, still living the hard life..." "Why haven't I killed myself yet? "The day will come..." "I just know it..." The rain was starting to drip on his face as the water came down fron the leaves of the tree. It felt good on him and he pulled off his shirt as it was starting to get damp and stick to his fur, revealing more healing cuts that went all the way down to his navel. He didn't like that sensation. He folded it under his head as a pillow along with his tail and laid on it. He then kicked off his shoes and socks and tried to go to sleep by the sound of nature which he found pleasing, especially the rain. It always seemed to put him to sleep as his eyes started to close. _What does this world have to offer me? Nothing..._ Matier always thought the same thing over and over again on a daily basis. But after he had a good thought about it he would always think again. _Doesn't everyone have a purpose? I certainly don't seem like I have one. Or maybe I haven't found out my true purpose yet... I don't know yet... By the time I figure out what that purpose is I will already be dead so it doesn't matter..._ His eyes finally closed under the soothing sound of the rain as he fell asleep._ Maybe tomorrow will be better..._


	2. Chapter 2 Self Blame

Matier awoke from his sleep the next morning with a cramp in his tail. He realized he had been sleeping on it the night before when he passed out. His right arm was still throbbing when he had cut into it with a box cutter. But the pain was nothing compared o the criticism he had cone through as a street urchin in the city.

As a child, he was always picked on as a being with animalistic features. In high school, his tail was always tugged on and was teased for wearing tight shorts, girly gold gauntlets and greaves, along with all the other feminine accessories he wore like a collar with rubies embedded in it, and silver rings fit for his tail. He acted _just _like a human. He talked, did work in school, ran track, played soccer and tennis, etc.

But the thing was he _wasn't_ human. He didn't have any idea what he was. _That_ was what pissed him off. As he moved in grade, it got worse. People picked fights with him, he got in trouble for busting faces and breaking arms, even though the males at the school were the first to antagonize him. Everyone called "gay" for wearing clothing of the opposite gender, especially the other males. Yeah, he knew he was, but he really didn't know what was wrong with it. It got so bad, he eventually dropped out of school as a junior. Afterwards, he started to live life of in his own, in "his own way".

He had no parents to take care of him, and didn't even know where his parents were. He stole food and clothing from stores to take to his den deep in the woods. People would always stare at him as an "unkempt animal that walked on two feet", which didn't bother him, as they minded their own business continued shopping. He was an expert thief and could lock pick any door you gave to him. He would walk in stores in the day time just to see what interested him. Then when closing time came, he would walk into the mall, in the dead of night, and lock pick his way into the security room to shut off the security cameras. It was then he could shop to his heart's content.

It was kind of cool to have his den literally right next to the mall. He tunneled his way from the woods to the outside of the mall. This way, when he wanted to steal, his home was frankly right next door. No one even bothered to check the tunnel right next to the parking lot.

Matier didn't worry about flooding either because he stole enough materials to make a waterproof shutter, which could also withstand a couple thousand rounds from a 50 cal. Even though he had no running water that wasn't a problem. He had a nearby lake which no one went in where he could bathe in.

He had his whole life here. Everything was perfect…

"And yet…..", he began, as he looked up at the branch, which was still dripping moisture from yesterday night's storm, "Why do I still feel unhappy? "Is it my fault I'm not liked by other people? "Why can't I…. just be like the others around me? "Why can't I just be….human?

He slowly sat up and looked at the clear blue sky, felt the moisture in his fur, smelled the wet grass around him, and listened to the birds sing, He picked up a fruit that had fallen from the apple tree he slept under and looked at it.

"Change can be just as simple as taking a bite out of something…." "It can be bitter or sweet…."

He bit into it, letting the juice run into his chest fur, the sugary taste covering his tongue. He smiled as he picked his shirt up and got off the ground.

"It tastes sweet….", he said as he started towards his den. It did taste sweet, but deep down inside, he still felt bitter towards himself. He always wondered if he should continue living or just put himself six feet under and not deal with the despair anymore.

_The easy way out is sometimes the best way,_ he thought, as he walked on finishing the apple and tossing the core. He began to cry as he heard a helicopter overhead and realized they were probably after him.

"Why do I seem to get myself into more trouble each day? "Fuck the world….." "If they want me let them come…." "I'm probably the first on their list, seeing as I'm not human.

"And they've probably found a lot of crap missing over the past eight months.

"Bring them to my door…..", he said to himself. He had stolen enough weapons and ammunition to start a small war. Handguns, shotguns, grenades, swords claymores, and over a hundred thousand rounds of ammunition.

"When they open this door, they won't see a fox who walks on two legs….." "They'll see a shotgun pointed right at their face…." "I sure hope they brought enough body bags….", he said with a half smile.

"I hope you like candy…..", he said as he looked at the Black Hawk. "Because you'll be getting some….." "Out of the hollow jacketed variety….", he finished as he shut the door with his tail.

He walked into his bedroom, laid on his bed, and looked at the ceiling. He always did this when he felt like thinking about the future. It helped some, but just thinking about it wasn't going to make it happen. There were a lot of things he wanted in his life. He knew he was a free bird, not held by the chains of discrimination. People in school picked on him, but he chose to ignore it. He wanted to move out of this hellish city. But most important of all, he wanted a boyfriend, someone who could understand how he felt.

Everyone teased him because he was gay, and as much as he tried to keep it in, to show he didn't care, it hurt… a lot. But it didn't stop him from being a compassionate fox, who just wanted to be understood by others…. Especially guys who were hard to understand him.

"I know there's someone out there who's probably going through the same deal I'm going through….", he said with a bit of hope. "I know if I keep trying. I'll find that "someone", he said as he drifted off to sleep. _I'm only myself,_ he thought as he fell to the power of his sacred haven.


End file.
